You Are The Hater

You are the hater who says I am fat.
You are the hater who knocks off my hat.
You are the hater who laughs at my spots.
You are the hater who pulls on my locks.
You are the hater who causes me grief.
You are the hater who smirks at my teeth.
You are the hater who screws up my work.
You are the hater who calls me a jerk.
You are the hater who will go down for this.
I am the victim who no one will miss.

The B

Bullies harm & upset everyone
Day after day they have their fun
But no more, we’ve had enough
Time to get our own back
Namin’ and shamin’ the whole damn lot
Protecting what dignity we’ve still got

Toes

Watch "LIGHTS - Toes Cover by Tanner Patrick - with lyrics" on YouTube

It Will Rain

Watch ""It Will Rain" - Bruno Mars Cover by Tanner Patrick - with lyrics" on YouTube

I'm Alone, Just Me.

Ketika aku datang
I thought that this is fun
Tapi kesenangan tidak bertahan lama
Semakin lama, semakin menghilang
I thought that i had any new friends
Tapi mereka hanya teman

Ya..
Just friend

Apakah aku tidak berhak untuk bahagia?
Apakah aku tidak berhak untuk bersama kalian?

What's the different betwen us?
We all are same

Human,
Breathing,
Smiling,
Laughing,
Loving.

Aku tidak marah
Aku hanya kecewa
Karena hidupku tidak sempurna
Aku menderita

Apakah aku salah?
I didn't ask to stay here
But i have to

And now
I am stuck
Aku terjebak disini
Tanpa seorang teman yang mengerti

Sendiri..
Just me..

I'll Keep It Hidden

My world is falling, crumbling apart, life is meaningless & that's just the start
My hearts so sore, I can feel it breaking & I swear to god it leaves me shaking
Late at night till early in the morning, lying in bed eyes wide open. Didn't sleep last night, like all the others, instead I just lie crying in the covers
Quick, wipe away all the tears before they come near. must hide this depression & the feelings of fear
For all they know I'm happy & always smiling, but deep inside my soul is dying
I can feel it rotting, it wants to scream, but I won't let it... not for the time being
I can never tell them how I feel cause the happiness I wear to them is real
For them to hear that I wish I was dead... it would kill them, they'd be filled with dread
So I'll try my best no to be selfish, I'll keep my secret hidden & just let them rest
but god I can't take it much longer... I'll probably be dead before they even wonder.

Complicated

Do you wanna know her?
Do you wanna try?
Her life's a little complicated 
Let me tell you why,
She feels unloved unwanted
She cries 6 times a day
Her heart is nearly broken 
She's in a lot of pain
She cuts herself to feel 
That's how she plays her games
She smiles at the blade
Like blood is summer rain

Do you still wanna know her?
Do you still wanna try?
Her life's still a little complicated
Let me tell you why, 
Besides her scars from cutting 
She's got bruises everywhere
Her mother tends to hit her
And doesn't even care 
Her dads an alcoholic
He screams and yells and night 
And when he's finally finished
He says she'll be alright 

So are you scared to know her?
Are you scared to try?
Do you think her life's a little complicated?
If not let me tell you why,
She screams and cries for help
Maybe a way out
She's trapped in a world of hate
A world of lies and tears 
She lies on her bed at night 
And wonders "Why am I still here?"
And when she falls asleep
Nightmares haunt her dreams

So are you still scared to know her?
Are you still scared to try?
You think her life's complicated?
Too late that girl died,
They found her on her bed 
Her throat slit every which way
They waved her death away 
Like it was a everyday thing 
She didn't deserve to die 
She deserved to live
But I guess when you live in hell
Heaven always wins.

SUICIDE REGRET

I lay on the floor,
She walks through the door.
What have I done?

My best friend is screaming and crying,
'Cause in reality I'm dying.
What have I done?!

It was an accident, I didn't mean to!
I wanna go back, think it through!
What have I done?!

But she can't hear me.
All I can see, is her missery.
What have I done?

I got my suffering to go away,
As I did, my best friend pain started today.
What have I done?

MONSTER

You think you know me?
You don't know the half of it.
You think you scare me?
i'm just pushing back the wrath again.

I'm a beast inside soon you'll see
That you doon't know the smallest part of me.

Pushing against the walls within
I'm living in anger
And drowning in sin

Just one drop of blood is all I need
To finaly set free
The evil thing inside of me.

You pushed me too far
Now it's your turn
To get pushed around,
In hell you'll burn.

I follow you close,
Silent like a mouse
I wait 'till you stop outside your house.

I do it fast,
But deadly as a demon
Hold you down
And know there's no screaming

I whisper the words of death in your ear
Your muffled cries,
That no one will hear

I hold your head up 'till I see your throat
I sink my teeth in untill you choke
Your eyes roll back inside of your head
One look at you and i hope you are dead

Now you're the victim,
And I'm the haunter
One look at him
And I know I'm a monster.

Goodbye Forever

They laugh,
While I cry.
They point,
As I die..

Insinde, I come undone.
I am here with myself.
I'm the only one,
In this world..

I'm unforgiving, for my sins.
The pain I have caused others.
Is where it all begins,
In my mind..

I have alreday gone.
The sun has set over my life
i will not see another dawn
So this is goodbye..

Forever.

WIDYA Qunaiti

Nia!
Nia!
Nia!
That's how I call her
She is my friend
Not the first friend
But the first one who match with me
In this goddamn place.

I never know
How can i've been close with her
But that what was happening to me.
I don't know how long our friendship will be.
But i am worry.
Really worry.

I am scared to have much friends.
Yes..
I am scared to lose.
I don't want to lose anything.
No one may gone before me.
That's why I decided to stay away
From her, and
From everyone else.

She could be your best friend.
Sometime she could be selfish.
But it's normal.
Everyone have their selfish part.
She is kind.
Sometime she laugh.
Sometime she can be mad.
And I made her mad at me everytime.

Funny?
No?
That's Funny! For me!
I can smile by remember her!
But I can't stay!
Holland is a far away from her!

I will just stay away from her.
So then I won't be hurt.

Forget?
NO!
I won't!
She was coming to my life!

Well,
That is Nia.
Widya Qunaiti.
And she was my friend.
I was spending almost 3 years with her.

Now,
I will leave.
But I know her.
Still I know.
And FOREVER I WILL.

I made this note to remember her.
If I can't meet her in the next time,
I will try to remember the time
When I was spending my time with her

So this is my note.
This is my letter.
For Nia.
And to God for keep my memories in my mind

This is a part of my journeys.

           -Love,

Louisa Gavriela Issac Tommin

FOOTNOTE:

that's my hand in the picture.

(LOL)

Hurt Words

You should know, bullying hurts.
It starts with one word, one word you blurt.
Fat, ugly, worthless.
These are the words they hear.
Did you know, your their biggest fear?

Day by day you torment them,
It takes so long for their hearts to mend.
All the ask for is one true friend,
But you make them want their lives to end.

Eveeryday they wake up with regret,
All they want to do is forget.
It's not just hitting and punching,
It's the words you say,
They hurt so much, they want to fade away.

This is when enough is enough,
They're sick of playing strong,
Sick of playing tough.
But they can make it through,
You may not have known,
But they always knew.

They put on a fake smile and pretend they're okay.
They believe they can make it all the way.
Of course your words still offend,
But they have been pieced back together again.

Someone leaves the crowd and lends them a hand,
They learn that it's time to stand.
Their smile is no longer fake,
Now they have no reason to ache.

You see, all they ever needed was a friend,
Someone to stand by them when the bullying came again.
Now they are free,
The insults barely sting, don't you see?

The bully is never wanted, unless wanted to leave,
The person you bullied now has no need for long sleeves.
Your work here is done,
Not that it should of started,
Now who's the one who feels broken hearted?

Bullying gave you power,
That they refused to give,
You can't help but wonder "what if".
What if they didn't get so strong?
What if they were crumbled all long?

What you don't think of, is what could of been,
what if they pulled the razor to their skin?
What if you pushed them too far,
To were they tied a rope around their collar.

What if they wrote down all the secrets they had to spill,
Right before taking an overdose on the pills?
You don't know what could you of been done,
You were doing that it all for fun.

You think they're losers, but they're stronger than you,
Have you seen what they've been through?
With your words you gave a black eye,
They are leaving, bully,
So say your goodbye.

But one more thing before you go,
Did you enjoy my little show?
Remember, words can hurt more than the punch,
Believe me now?
Cause this was just a hunch.

1.am ( I AM )

I am like everyone else
I wonder why no one understand me
I hear the whispers
I hear 'em laugh
I can see the cruel jokes as I pass by
I pretend not to hear

I am like everyone else
I feel all alone
Will they ever see?

I touch lives of everyone around me
I dream of happier times

I am like everyone else
I understand that people are different
I hope everyone else will see
I try to be the best I can be
I am like everyone else

.B.U.L.L.Y.I.N.G.

B - Brutal beatings beyond the feeling of pain

U - Understanding this hurt might get me closer to being sane

L -  Love is a myth

L -  Life has become like a work of Stephen King

Y - You don't know what it's like

I  -  I am treated like just some "THING"

N - Never to be kissed, comforted, or loved

G - Going the rest of my life never to be hugged